Thursday, July 7, 2016

Pimp My Bio

I've never been much of a joiner, even in school, so when I read (today) about Pimp My Bio for #PitchWars mentees, I hesitated.

But I have learned a few things since school... as an adult, as an author, as a socially awkward middle aged man in a virtual room full of digital natives wearing their neon warpaint in the form of GIFs and selfies.

I have learned that sometimes you have to dance if you want to attend the party.

So, here I am.

Oh yes, you don't know me. My name is Ben, I'm 53 and own a small software company. My software hides in the background, much like me, so you won't have noticed it, even if you use it.

I write stories and poems and occasionally draw things. I have three kids, but they've all flown the nest, so I live quietly with my wife and two cats (okay, they aren't quiet - they knock things over a lot). I write middle grade fantasy, among other things. (I also write poetry - Orson Scott Card once wrote and said he loved my poems. How cool is that?)

My Pitch Wars middle grade novel has trolls (nice ones) and giants (not so nice, but perhaps just misunderstood) and dragons (nasty pieces of work). It also has friendship and adventure and... well, you'll just have to read it. Suffice it to say, the main characters are eleven-year-old Bernie and Tish. He's always hungry but more timid than a troll should be. She's obsessed with rocks and loves trouble, even when it leaves her smelling strongly of cinnamon.

Below is a drawing I made of Tish's home, though it is a bit hard to see through the water.

Thanks you to Lana Pattinson for hosting the mentee bio blogs. See other links on her website. And thank you for stopping by. Mind the penguin on your way out.


  1. Good luck with PitchWars! Trolls, giants, and dragons are always a hit!

  2. Love the "neon warpaint in the form of" comment. And good luck too!

    1. Thanks! (Though in retrospect, I hope my characterization of digital natives as wearing warpaint is not offensive to anyone.)

    2. Hopefully not, but if so, you didn't intend any so dialogue should take care of it, I assume...

  3. Ben, I am loving your story the more I read about it! So excited to see more!